hello everyone...i know you don't read my blog but anyways....im in college now...wierd eh?....ya so im bored trying to kill some time before this trip ti kingston at 12:30pm.....wahoo...i htionk im gonna go to the mall...ill ttyl

~Meg~

yo yo yo what is up in the hizzouse??...just chillaxin' at my pops bureau on his comp. word to your mothers chest hair!!! bamm!....lol im such a loser! i am not a wigger. i absolutly hate wiggers they all need to be shot. now. in the head... BOOM!...hahaha.... sorry three too many iced caps...in an hour.....i know im crazy but its fuckin hot outside....i feel so alone...im in dirty old cornwall and this office smells like doo doo...mixed with motor oil and buckley's....don't ask it's nausiating....* blegh*. any who...i just went shopping...i have to go to this wedding thingy tomorrow...well they're already married so technically its not a wedding but its some sort of .......uhh.....lunchin!! hahaha that's the word...i rock my invisible sox. and its gonna be 35 degrees with the humidity so i had the challenge of finding a nice top that wasn't sluty but wouldn't make me sweat buckets in a mall that had some nice stores with tonnes of clothes that i wanted but of course nothing i tried on would fit me. i am kind of a big girl but im well porportioned so it's usually not that hard to find clothes that fit properly but today it was impossible....every store usually has sizes extra small to extra large well wouldn't you know it that their sizes only went up to medium...you found the occasional large shirt but they were hidious or they were thick heavy sweaters. i know some people would say " well maybe you should lose weight" i know i probably should but im pretty content with the way that i am so...how do i put this...umm....screw you...and you mom. so any way i came to this town cuz its twice the size of shitty old brockville so one would assume that the clothing selection would be a fair bit better. well not here!!! you can get clothes that fit you here but thay are fuckin ugly and are made for 60 year -old women. im 17....not 60...finding clothes in brockville is a lot easier....word to the wise....if you are any bigger than and medium or large and actually want to dress appropiately for your body type DO NOT come to cornwall. yes thay have nice clothes but apparently bigger people aren't allowed to be trendy like skinny people.

~Meg~

p.s- holy fuck that is the ditsy-est i have ever sounded in my entire life. but is really frustrating.

so hidy ho people of the internet world.i hope that you are good cuz my life fuckin sux....i have to go to college in september and i am terrified...i WILL be lonely for ever...i just realized that....i can get my G2 at the end of sept......i hope.....i have absolutly no life what so ever...its summer and im camping with my parets al most every weekend....some one shoot me i've had enough family shit.....

~Meg~

so ya....not much has happened in meaghan world.....except that i got a car but i still can't drive it on my own yet so that sux. im bored and it's the last night of easter weekend......time goes by too quickly....it seems like yesterday that me and jaida were in grade 10 trying to be skater chicks skateboarding up and down my drive way listening to goldfinger....fuck...i wish i could go back to grade 10....that was the best time ever....i had so much fun. now i sorta just feel lost....i mean most of the time im so caught up in trying to be the way my parents and friends want me to be that i forgot who i really am and i can't seem to find that person anymore...well i have to try to sleep. bye.

~Meg~

so i finally talked my dad into letting me stay another night at my moms. he's such an idiot. anyways i don't know why but i feel crappy. there's no reason for it it's just how i feel. im starting to get the feeling when some someones backstabbing you. i don't know if anyone is right now but if they are then i hate you. you need to be shot and kicked in the face.

rugby started again...not that anyone cares but me. more exercise.so this feeling is really starting to bug me. a lot. i want to know if someone is doing some that's going to hurt me. anyways....i guess ill have to deal with either way. i wanna do something. i've been doing nothing all weekend and i feel lazy.

i ment for this blog to be a long one but uhh it's not turning out that way so later

~Meg~

i'm home alone babysitting my younger siblings while my friends are having fun. i want to move back in with my mom. i just don't know how to tell everyone. i can't tell my dad cuz he's been in a good mood lately and if i tell my mom i'm gonna get her all excited . and that would suck because if i am gonna stay with my dad then it would break her heart...again.my dad thinks that im not ready for college in september.which pisses me off cuz i wanna get out of that damn house. i hate it there. he always makes me feel like a worthless sack of shit even when he's not talking to me. he just looks at me like a thing.like im some burden that he has to live with and has no choice.not to mention he's always bad-mouthing my mom. i hate it. then when he tries to explain why he doesn't think im ready for college all he says is i know you like a book. and he doesn't. i don't tell him anything cuz he would just yell at me for complaining. i think that he just keeps me around so that he can take his anger out on me so he doesn't have blame himself for his pathetic little life.

~Meg~

hello im in a super good modd and i dont know why.....lol....ive got a lovely bunch of coconuts deedely deedely there they are a standing in a row bum bum bum big ones small ones some as big as your head and i cant remember the rest of the son....im a nut bag i am i am....im gonna shut up now omg christmas is coming...weeeee i love christmas....its awsome....yay...william h macy is a very ugly man.... poor fucker.....he looks like a mouse....holy shit 2 weeks and christmas holidays...Yay...i love xmas holidays...no school for 2 weeks...i hate school ok im gonna go now bye!

~Meg~

fuck. fuck everything. don't you hate when people who are supposed to be you friends ignore you. or when your with one of them and your having a super dooper time and then one of your other friends comes along and they're all "chummy" and your sitting there....alone. it sux cuz the only reason that you're there is so that they can make fun of you right infront of your face. then they try to make it sound sarcastic but you know that they really mean it.assholes. everyone is an asshole. you try and try to be as nice as you can so that everyone will like you,i know that's not possible,  or at least not hate you. i dont care if people don't really like me very much it's when they try to hide it and make me think that they still like me. i always fell like a last resort. or like people are being nice to me cuz they feel sorry for me. more assholes. everyone. you're all assholes.fuck you.

~Meg~ 

holy crap its been awhile.

not much has happened in the Meaghan world. my Dads an asshole as ususal. You know like nit-picking at stupid little things that make no sense what so ever. I went to go see 'The Grudge' with Masterloafer yesterday...I think it's safe to say it scared us shitless. I don't know about her but I haven't seen a movie that scared me that much since....uhh......I was 12 and saw the 'Exorsist'...and then that movie kinda bacame funny. The grudge is one of those jumpy movies...it's good. It's just so scarey that when you scream or whatever you do when your scared all you can do is laugh at yourself cuz you finally realize how stupid you look/sound. ya . I'm very bored in my history class "doing reasearch".....:)....i hate this class.It's so boring and it feels like I've been sitting here for hours when it's only been 1/2 an hour....ya anyways i should go and do some work.

~Meaghan~

hello. im back from thunderbay and happy to be home but i not really happy. schools starts in 2 weeks and im really only looking forward to see my friends again. im am going to be in grade 12 and its gonna be great i guess except for the fact that it's my last year and this means that i have to go to college and actually grow up. which is something i don't know how to do. i still feel like a little kid all the time but then again it doesn't help that i have 3 younger siblings and the only people around both of my houses are way younger than me and don't understand anything...i just sat in my room and stared at the celing for 2 hours and all i could think was why does my family hate me....they're probably holding a grudge cuz i moved in with my dad and i wish they would just drop it....it also doesn't help that i wanna move back in with my mom....but i can't...i will live in complete misery with my dad as long as my mom doesn't win...see if i move back in than she'll say i told ya so and she won't let it down...i need to do something......right now...like something crazy but there's nothing to do...well i gtg

~Meg~

 :cry: im in thunderbay and im bored out of my mind. i've been here for a week and this is the first time that i've been on the computer.......well im not exactly in thunderbay...im 1/2 an hour away from the actual city so im stuck in the middle of nowhere.......and im 18 hours away from home....i hate it here.....this place is really dirty and it smells like wet dog and rotton eggs.....its really gross and the people keep trying to make me eat all the time...like at 11:00 at night they keep asking me if i want some more of what ever we had for supper that night....the first night we were here we hade spaghetti and meatballs....sounds good right?....WRONG!!!! it was really gross and not to mention that was our supper for the first 3 nights we were here...ok ill shut up now

~Meg~